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oil on canvas
A routine police patrol rang the emergency dispatch asking for an ambulance crew to check on the mental fitness of two sprightly nonagenarians. When the paramedics arrived, they found 92-year-old Ants and his 89-year-old lifelong partner Linda stalled squarely in the middle of a domestic drama.
It turned out Ants had gone on a late-night “research expedition” into the wilder corners of adult websites and picked up a handful of daring new “techniques” he was keen to demonstrate. Linda, unsurprisingly, was less than enthusiastic. What began as a calm discussion quickly escalated into slapstick domesticity: with the precision of a seasoned general, Linda gave Ants’s walker a firm shove. Ants collapsed in a one-man topple and, bless him, simply couldn’t haul himself back up.
Still fuming, Linda crossed her arms and refused to help—leaving the paramedics to play peacemaker, life coach, and emergency lifter all at once. It’s just another day when “rescue” means patching up bruised egos as much as bruised limbs.
